Posted in childbirth, English, Family, Mama sein, spiritual topics, womanhood

– From traumatic to very beautiful

Since I keep hearing of traumatic birth experiences, I feel deeply on my heart to share my own experience because I found a way how delivery can be a very beautiful, faster, less painful/ more bearable experience. I believe every mother can prepare herself for a rather positive experience of delivery.

1st child: Josephine Okekeni

For my first delivery I thought, well when I visit a birth preperation course and follow all the instructions the midwife gives, then I will be prepared enough. So the day came when I woke up in the middle of the night with contractions. I looked at the clock to observe how often they were coming and as they became more regular and intense, we decided to drive to the hospital. On arrival, the doctor immediately examined me and told me that the Cervix was only 1 cm opened, that we still had a lot of time and we could even go home… But since we had just driven 30 minutes and feeling nervous (being our first child), we decided to stay. I was sooo nervous that my body tensed up making every contraction even the more painful and as a result delayed the opening of the Cervix. Thank God that I was the only prego in the Maternity ward on that day so atleast I could freely move around, which did not really helped me to relax, and this time felt like forever. I had to take some painkillers in between. At midnight there was a shift change for the midwives and the midwife assigned to me came in stressed and seeing how exhausted I had become, persuaded me to do a Peridural Anaesthesia (PDA) so that I could rest a bit and regain strength for delivery after a long day. I had to succumb to her persuasion even though I had no idea what that would mean. I had to sign a paper that if anything went wrong, it would be at my own risk. That was a bit scarry. But finally after I got the PDA, everything went well and I could sleep for about three hours. Then at sunrise – it was already 24 hours spent in the hospital. Another shift change brought in new sets of midwives. This time, a younger and very energetic midwife was assigned to me and also, my Cervix was wide opened. The Midwife helped to “break my water“ and this led to stronger contractions. Because of the PDA, my left leg was numb so that the Midwife had to hold it up to enable me push while lying in bed. The Midwife gave me several instructions so that at 11am, after 30 hours in the hospital, our wonderful baby girl Josephine Okekeni was born. We stayed for three more days in a family room together in the hospital before we were released to go home. It was a baby-friendly hospital, so they supported me a lot in breastfeeding and bonding as a family.


Josephine

2nd child: Charlotte Okpunyi

When I started to prepare for the 2nd birth I noticed that the fear of delivery was stronger than the excitement for the baby. At the same time my midwife abandoned me when she didn’t have enough women for the birth preparation course – afterall for my good. So I had to find my own way, which felt in the beginning quite frustrating because I only had 6 more weeks before delivery and I felt so alone in this. But then I cried out to God and started browsing for resources that would help me to prepare well and finally, I found a very good book that a christian lady recommended on Youtube. This book is what I want to share with you now:

Book ‘Supernatural Childbirth’, by Jackie Mize

Authored by  Jackie Mize and called Supernatural Childbirth. It’s a book with a lot of positive testimonies of childbirth, some with mostly practically no labour pains. The last pages contain prayers and proclamations. The woman who recommended this  book also shows a video on how while she was on her way to the hospital was so full of life, positive, excited, and praising God. She documented how she experienced a very beautiful almost pain free delivery and that got me also very excited for my own. I started reading the book and kept thinking I had enough time to read all through.

My due date was the 25th of December and we had a very lovely family friend who blessed us with a date-night while she  babysitted our little daughter. We chose Friday the 9th of December so my husband and I could go to the cinema and afterwards to a greek restaurant. During the day I felt some light contractions but not like serious ones. While eating in the restaurant they got stronger and stronger but then I just joked about it saying what if we have to drive straight to the hospital after the date. Around 10:30 p.m. we made it home and chatted a bit with our babysitter. Josephine was sleeping by then and I noticed that the contractions were somehow getting more intensed. I decided to lay down to relax to see if the pain would reduce. We already sent the babysitter home but I told her please leave your phone on in case we need to call you back this night. After briefly lying in bed, I noticed that it was actually getting serious now. Unfortunately, we couldn’t reach my friend again so my husband had to drive me to the hospital while our little daughter kept sleeping alone at home. At the hospital  the Midwife examined me immediately and seeing that my Cervix was already 7cm wide, she panicked also because she still had to fill in some paper works for me. At the same time she sent my husband home to take care of our daughter. Even though the Midwife was so stressed out, I was calmed and relaxed. After less than one hour, with some few pushs, our second girl was born, there was a litte labour pain, again in bed without any complications.

Charlotte

3rd child: Elyon Ocheri

For the 3rd child I wanted to have an even better experience. The third baby was as heavy as the first child and my experience was very beautiful, self determined, and fast without the need of much help.

I had already a good experience with the book. So this time I was totally positive about it, no fear left. The only challenge was what to do with our two kids at home. This time I came across an article about good labour positions, saying straight ones are the best and lying in bed is the most contradictive one, where the baby can’t flow well causing more pain. But this is a position that doctors encouraged since it gives them more overview and control. Through that new information I definitely wanted to try a different position. Briefly before delivery I also did some breath exercises with my midwife. This time I just used the book for prayer and some proclamations with the last pages which really helped. When the day came with contractions in the morning I prepared for hospital and made sure that the kids were ready for kindergarten. We also had informed some people (as a back-up plan) who could take care of our girls if it would happen at different times. I also imagined which times would be best and my biggest desire was that my mom would be there for the girls. On that particular morning when the contractions were getting stronger, I called my mum. She immediately confirmed that it’s happening and that she will take the next train to us. At this moment I realised that we had to make ready for the hospital. This time the pain was more in the back, which was very uncomfortable, especially sitting in the car. But most importantly we made it to the hospital on time. I had two midwifes who attented to me, cause I was considering a water birth. They hardly needed to help me. I followed my instinct. Mostly processed the labour on a mat with a gymnastic ball. And since I was very heated up, I hardly could hold my husband. But when one strong contraction came I had to grap his hands and the water broke in that glorious moment. The contractions intensified and I pushed about 3 or 4 times till the baby was out. This was the most beautiful delivery I ever experienced, so self-determined, with cheerful music in the background and so smooth. Even the midwifes thanked me afterwards  for allowing them the honor of witnessing such a beautiful childbirth.

Elyon
Posted in Cultural things, English, Family, spiritual topics

Thanksgiving/ Erntedank

#Grapes from our balkony – #a big harvest – #good and healthy juice and gelee

In Germany we are celebrating „Thanksgiving“ today. So I feel inspired to write and share with you some impressions. If we would directly translate the German Word for „Thanksgiving“, „Erntedank“ into English, it would be „Harvestthanks“ or „thanking for the harvest“. In early days in Germany, most people were farmers and lived from their own harvest. The „Harvestthanks“ literally meant thanking God for all the harvested produce. Nowadays, since very few are farming, and most of us not, what is our “Harvestthanks”?

I’m today reflecting on all the things God has blessed me with.

I’m so grateful for the gift of  life.

When I look at my two wonderful daughters, I’m so amazed at how God has created them, how healthy, perfectly formed, no missing body parts… When I think about the way I look at my kids and marvel at them, I am reminded on how God our heavenly Father, the creator of our flesh and bones is looking at us and celebrating His perfect Work of creation.

Then I can really meditate on that scripture in Zephaniah 3:17 „the Lord your God is with you, the Mighty Warrior who saves. He will take great delight in you; in his love he will no longer rebuke you, but will rejoice over you with singing.“

How often are we discontent with ourselves? How often do we rather feel stuck with our human flaws than see the many little things that are actually good? God who created us, rejoices over us His creation. He knows the real value of what he has created.

My little daughters have no idea yet how precious they are to me, and they might never realise why I can simply look at them and rejoice over their lives (even with their excesses). I think that this is how it is with our own lives. We have no idea how much value we actually have before GOD, the Almighty, the Sovereign, and ever Faithful.

The same with the things that God has blessed us with. Do we really know and see the value of it? How often do we compare ourselves with others in terms of what they have and we don’t? Let’s look at our own lives today and take stock of what we actually have?

Maybe the working place comes with a lot of stress and imperfections, but it has helped to pay the bills last year?

Maybe the apartment you are living in is not the dream house you have in mind, but you have an address to retire to with a roof over your head; a protection from all kinds of weather.

Maybe you have problems or conflicts in your family but atleast you have people around you that you can share life with and who form you?

Maybe you don’t swim in money but atleast you have s.th. to eat, drink and to dress everyday.

I think a lot of times we tend to evaluate our lives too critically and as a result miss out on the precious moments making up our daily activities. So why not take today and think about the things that you can be grateful for, reflect on those things that you have planted this year where you can already see some progress or even a full harvest?

And please remember it’s not about perfection!

Especially not in the way we see and evaluate perfection. It can really help to see things in God’s eyes. God, the only one who is perfect.

„For with you (God) is the fountain of life; in your light we see light.“ Psalm 36:9

Posted in English, Family, spiritual topics

2019 – the year to SHINE and to Conquer



Dear readers!

In the front page I shortly wrote a bit about the year 2019. But now I actually want to take some more time to write about 2019 on a deeper level. For me it is all time important to find out in which season I am in because I believe that the Lord has created different seasons as we can read in the book of Eccl. 3,1-8, in the bible. It helps me to understand and to deal with every season, situation and circumstance.

On my 31st birthday with my beautiful family

ECCLESIASTES 3,1: “THERE IS A TIME FOR EVERYTHING, AND A SEASON FOR EVERY ACTIVITY UNDER THE HEAVENS: […].


Besides the different seasons that can be in one year or over several years, I believe there is s.th. about every year that concerns people individually, nationally and some things are for all people all over the globe. That’s why I love to hear prophecies from other people about the year, to see if it aligns with what I’m sensing.


In Germany we also have a particular scripture for each year, called ‘Jahreslosung’. The scripture for this year is in Psalm 34,15: “(TURN FROM EVIL AND DO GOOD); SEEK PEACE AND PURSUE IT. I think this is such a relevant scripture in a time like this when there are a lot of things going on in the world: wars, fights, catastrophes, corruption, injustice, crime etc.


Every year when the year goes to an end I like to reflect on the whole year. I think about what were the highlights, what am I grateful for, what happened, what did God do, what was challenging. I look through my journal and check my goals for the year and evaluate it. Last but not least I try to pick out the best pictures of the year and we watch them all together as a family for new year’s eve. That is the best part of it, cause pictures somehow show the beauty of a year, the best moments, the highlights. They help my negative emotions to cheer up and to see the good things of a year. They help me to draw a positive conclusion. At the same time I also like to look into the new year, already, before the year ends. I like to take some time out with God and to ask HIM prayerfully what I can expect for 2019.

The ‘Beauty-Table’ my birthday gift in 2019 from my thoughtful husband. I’ve wished for it mainly to make the Afro-hair of our two princesses at a place where they can feel special and have good experiences with it. But it means also a lot more for me as 2019 is meant to SHINE!!! 😀




I give you some impressions that I personally got for 2019:

When 2018 was the year of new beginnings and breakthrough then 2019 God will establish these new things more and will stabilise them. From the foundation to the top. HE will give you more understanding as you seek HIM.

Psalm 36,10: “For with you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light” It is your time to SHINE. Try new things, go after your ideas. Focus. Never let your own fear stop you from moving forward. Don’t be afraid to shine or to do different. Be courageous, be, go with your creativity and let your loved ones live out their creativity as well. Stay opened for new ways. If you find yourself in a new situation take it optimistically and ask the Lord to show you the meaning of it before evaluating it negativeley. Seek things that have eternal values.

Following I have you summarised some prophecies from Lana Vawser’s website (https://lanavawser.com/) who posts for every year and whom I really respect because her previous prophesy for 2018 was so accurate:

2019 is going to be a year of significant OPPORTUNITY, it is going to be a year of significant INCREASE of heavenly vision and perspective

2019 is the year ASK (Jeremiah 33:3) and to move in divine wisdom and heavenly strategy like never before. 2019 will be a year where we will see the demonstration of the Lord’s “outstretched arm” to deliver and save in power, like never before. This is a time of great harvest. This is a time of great outpouring. This is a season of rain. The move of God that we are all anticipating and feel the Lord continually speaking about is upon us.

“I am decreeing over 2019 that it is a year to CONQUER and to ADVANCE. It is a year to take new ground and to move ‘off the beaten track’. […] For there will be many times in 2019 where it will require radical obedience and moving ‘against the grain’ in many ways, but where I guide, I will provide. Do not fear the testings that will come in this year for I have already given you the key to overcome. My Word and the decreeing of My Word will cause you to overcome. The ferocious focus of faith upon what I have spoken to you will cause you to move forward in the victory that is already yours in Me. For the enemy will come in 2019 with new strategies and new ways to ‘lure’, to ‘tempt’ and to ‘test’ but My people you will overcome and conquer as you stay close to My heart and decree My Word.”

“For these testing times and times of temptation are bringing a stretching and a fortification within you My people to carry My power in ways you have never experienced before. Do not despise the battles. Do not despise the time of testing, for I am giving you the keys to overcome. I am leading you into greater victory. There will be MAJOR demonstrations of My victory in and through your life in 2019 as you stay close to Me and hold onto My Word.”


UPGRADE YOUR VISION AND PERSPECTIVE

God is increasing, strengthening, maturing and fortifying His Bride and His decree over you is that you will SHINE in 2019, that you will CONQUER in 2019 and be part of the mighty move of His Spirit upon the earth that’s before us.

Sermons for the new year that I can recommend to listen to:

– “Joyce Meyer – Cry Out Sermon 2019” auf YouTube an
https://youtu.be/dLeuVyb5l94

– Steven Furtick, Elevation Church, Come through drippin: https://youtu.be/jVuar3a6uqs

– T. D. Jakes, God is pushing you to a place of more:
https://youtu.be/jS6HylYgwhA

Have a blessed and purposeful year ahead of you! 🙏🏽💖👑